Neither this nor that

      If you work too hard, there is never any time for her.
      If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum.
      
      If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation.
      If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt and find   something better.
      
      If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism.
      If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity.
      
      If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment.
      If you keep quiet, it's male indifference.
      
      If you cry, you're a wimp.
      If you don't, you're insensitive.
      
      If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist.
      If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman.
      
      If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination.
      If she asks you, it's a favor.
      
      If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain.
      If you don't, you're a slob.
      
      If you buy her flowers, you're after something.
      If you don't, you're not thoughtful.

"taken from - http://jokes.christiansunite.com/Marriage/Why_Men_Can%27t_Win.shtml"